by Dr. Claude Needham
Contrary to popular belief, you don't develop lots of decorum and savoir-faire just because you're dead. Au contraire, it's not so easy to handle the odd new situations that arise in the apres vie. Well, we got good news and we got bad news. The good news is that you can learn proper apres vie social graces. The bad news is that you can only learn good social habits while you're alive--which since you're dead right now doesn't do you a lot of good. Fortunately for you, this book has been written with you in mind. But be warned--this book contains great and amazing secrets meant only for the eyes of the dead. So, if you are not dead, whatever you do, don't order this book!